Day 330: Baby Drama

Hello wild ones! Before I get into the nitty gritty of today’s post I want to give a little disclosure, or maybe just a warning, or explanation for the anger that may very well come across in this post. I realize that I am in no position to judge someone else life, none of us should be, but sometimes it can’t be helped. So, this post was not written to offend anyone, it’s just the way I view this unique circumstance I find myself involved in, I apologize ahead of time if my words cause anyone offense. That being said, I am entitled to my own opinions just as you are entitled to not read them. Alright, that crap aside, let’s dive right in.

A couple of weeks ago my phone pinged at 3:30 am, which immediately put me on edge, no one that I know is awake that early unless there is some sort of problem. The words, “I’m beyond terrified and I’m going to need my best friend to be by my side,” told me all I needed to know. Something was about to change. Something I wasn’t going to like was about to happen. And then 2 seconds later a picture came through of a positive pregnancy test.

I remember letting out a little huff, like a humorless laugh, because not that long ago my younger cousin had revealed the very same news to me and in that moment it seemed that everyone I knew was freaking having kids. And I can’t even begin to tell you how pissy that makes me. It’s not really a rational thought to have, but seriously there should be some kind of permit that has to be filed that allows people to procreate. Like, if I want to buy a damn gun I have to fill out paperwork and get a permit and have a background check, but if I want to bring a new being into this world all I have to do is open my damn legs. How fucked up is that? Honestly it’s always been something that baffles me and I know that everyone should be given the choice to do what they want with their own bodies, but freaking hell sometimes I wish we lived in the kind of society/universe where we had to ask permission to procreate. That may sound crazy…okay it does sound crazy because if there were some kind of sanctions on our ability to reproduce there would probably be tons of other crazy laws…

It really does just chafe me that irresponsible people are allowed to fuck up so majorly. Because at the end of the day having unprotected sex is just irresponsible not to mention dangerous. You may as well just play Russian Roulette, that way at least you’re only fucking up your life.

I’m the product of an unwed mother (how weird does that sound) and she and I had this whole conversation this past weekend about my best friend’s situation. If it was me, if I found out I was pregnant by my dead beat ex-boyfriend who already had 3 other children by 3 different women I would high tail it to the nearest clinic and get myself taken care of. That may offend you pro-lifers out there, but I’m sorry, I’m not sorry. I get that your argument is the unborn shouldn’t have to pay for the bad decisions or their parent’s, but how is it any better to subject that life form to a life of hardship. This girl lives at home with her parents still, the fetus’ father is not going to be in the picture, she makes less than $400 a week at her job, and she doesn’t pay bills on her own. She literally does not take care of herself, how is she going to take care of a baby?

I don’t understand it. How can one person be so selfish? Because that’s what it sounds like to me, pure selfishness. You’re putting your beliefs in this fetus above the well being of that future child. I just don’t understand any of it. I guess I can’t see into the minds or hearts of others, all I can know is my own mind and my mind would be telling me to run as fast and as far as I could to make sure that I didn’t damage another living beings life or my own.

I say I’m pro-choice, but sometimes I wish there wasn’t a choice. I wish there was some kind of competency test that you had to take in order to be allowed to rear a child. It’s a gift to bring human life into this world and I honestly wish it was a gift that wasn’t so freely taken advantage of.

This post may very well end up getting brought up again. I’ve got about 7 more months of dealing with the emotions of a pregnant girl who I’d love nothing more to shake until her teeth rattle in her damn head, but I don’t think I’m allowed to do that. So, if I can manage somehow not to throw my 7 year friendship away by telling my best friend that I think she’s a selfish, irresponsible idiot for keeping this baby I’ll end up venting here more often that not. Sorry.

Night!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

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