Day 335: Goin Down in Flames

Hello wild ones! I could have used a sedative today. I got a grand total of two hours of sleep. My mind has been racing with all the things I think I still need to do before Thursday’s departure, the fact that I really could use the money I saved for this trip on bills, and just pure excitement of getting to visit a new place. It’s too much for my fragile mind!!!! Luckily right now I’m not tired, not sure how much longer that is going to last. Cross your fingers for me that it holds until I get back home in the morning and I don’t crash at work.

My bag is packed and sitting in front of my closet for Thursday morning and I’ve already got my airport outfit laid out on my dresser. I’m bound and determined not to be running around like a chicken missing it’s damn head on Thursday morning…only time will tell if my preparation will pay off. I’m not holding my breath. I know myself too well, there will undoubtedly be something I’m forgetting Thursday and I’ll probably have to go through my entire damn suitcase one more time to make sure I packed everything I need. I’m hopeless.

I failed to get my house in tip top shape. It’s not dirty any longer, but mission sweep and mop crashed and burned last night because I was fighting with my stomach and head. Poor excuse, but depending on what I plan for Thursday morning after I get off work I may very well do a quick run through the house with the broom and mop. Maybe…probably not.

I’m worried about money, though that of course is not really new. I’ve been saving for this dang trip and now that it’s time to go it honestly doesn’t feel like enough and that pisses me off because I should not be able to spend the amount of money I saved in less than 4 days. UGH! And I keep looking at my savings account and thinking I could really use that money to get ahead on some bills or do my Christmas shopping. Which only adds to the stress of not wanting to spend money while on vacation. There’s just way too much shit rolling around in my cluttered mind. I need a vacation from my vacation.

Here’s the part of the blog where we get to the good news. Drum roll please!!! My thumb doesn’t hurt anymore! Still have no idea why it hurt in the first place, but while I was tossing and turning today I realized that there was no pain my the appendage, so at least I have that going for me…wow. Sad day when the best news I’ve got is that my stupid thumb doesn’t hurt anymore, but at least I have that.

Alright kids, I’m gonna go…I need to silently stress some more about things I can’t really control and wonder if my plane is going to take a dive once we’re in the air and then decide if I think it would be such a bad thing…right now I’m leaning towards no, it would not be the worst thing for my plane to go down…I’m only sort of serious. And on that cheerful note, NIGHT!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

 

Day 334: Packing

Hello wild ones! I’m just about all packed up for Vegas! The morning we leave I’ll have to pack up my bathroom stuff to make sure I’ve got all the girly shit I think I might need, but other than that my bag is ready to go. 

I am beyond excited!!! The stuff I bought last week came in today and everything fit and is just as cute as it was online, so that was a success. 

I never realized how much I use my right thumb. Since the damn thing started to hurt I’ve noticed that it plays an important part of my daily activities . Pulling my pants on and off, need my dang thumb. Texting on my phone, sends a jolt of pain through my hand. Carrying a freaking cup, super painful. Holding a plate, nearly sent me to tears. It’s ridiculous. Still have no idea how in the world I managed to hurt my stupid thumb, but it still hurts…I’ll never take the use of my fingers from granted again that’s for damn sure. 

Night!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

Day 333: Kindle Injury

Hello wild ones! I got all my laundry done! I also got my room cleaned! But the rest of the house is still in desperate need of a good scrubbing. Looks like I’ve got a long night of cleaning ahead. 

My thumb hurts…it almost feels like I jammed the darn thing, but I can’t for the life of me figure out how I could have possibly done that. I’m starting to think it’s a sprain from holding my dang tablet for so long while I read…it would be my luck that my hobby, a hobby that by all all counts should be considered very safe, should cause me pain. Such is my life. 

We’ve only got 4 more days until Vegas!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH! I’m freaking out over here!

Alright, well I should probably get to folding the mountain of clean laundry currently piled on my bed and start thinking about what I’m going to pack. Night kids!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

Day 332: Prepacking

Hello wild ones! Well its Saturday night and I’m currently laid out on my bed reading…not cleaning my house like I should be, though I do have clothes in the washer and dryer. 

I started a new book before dinner and I’m just trying to finish it before I delve into the sweeping and mopping that needs to happen. I’m also planning on starting my packing this weekend. Clothes are going straight from the dryer into my suitcase. ha. 

Night!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

Day 331: Online Shopping

Hello wild ones! The weekend is upon us finally. I have to admit that this week has gone by rather quickly. Maybe it’s all the new books I’ve discovered or the fact that Vegas is less than a week away now. Who knows?

So I did something kind of stupid yesterday afternoon before coming to work. I went shopping online. I mentioned I was looking for shoes, but apparently while perusing Torrid’s website I decided there were a couple of other things I needed. Blame it on their clearance being half off…I ended up spending a little more money than I should have and of course I had to pay for express shipping because I’m flying out Thursday, so I got a little out of control for me. I still managed to stay under $200, but it still hurt to see the money come out of my tiny bank account and I had buyer’s remorse almost immediately. Hopefully everything I bought will fit so well that I’ll be able to convince myself that it was totally find.

I got myself a pair of black skinny jeans, black wedges to wear out on the town, a pair of leopard print Mary Janes, a bright red pea coat, and a pink moto jacket. New clothes and new shoes, that was my Christmas gift to myself. ┬áSo fingers crossed that everything I bought fits perfectly otherwise I’m screwed.

I have to get my house cleaned up…I know I say that every week, but this week it actually has to be done. I want my house to be clean while I’m out of town and I’d like to come back from my little vacation to a clean house, so tomorrow night I am going into overdrive and getting the place back into shape.

For the rest of tonight I’m going to listen to good music, watch my trucks on GPS, and hopefully find another new author to be mildly obsessed with. NIGHT!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

Day 330: Baby Drama

Hello wild ones! Before I get into the nitty gritty of today’s post I want to give a little disclosure, or maybe just a warning, or explanation for the anger that may very well come across in this post. I realize that I am in no position to judge someone else life, none of us should be, but sometimes it can’t be helped. So, this post was not written to offend anyone, it’s just the way I view this unique circumstance I find myself involved in, I apologize ahead of time if my words cause anyone offense. That being said, I am entitled to my own opinions just as you are entitled to not read them. Alright, that crap aside, let’s dive right in.

A couple of weeks ago my phone pinged at 3:30 am, which immediately put me on edge, no one that I know is awake that early unless there is some sort of problem. The words, “I’m beyond terrified and I’m going to need my best friend to be by my side,” told me all I needed to know. Something was about to change. Something I wasn’t going to like was about to happen. And then 2 seconds later a picture came through of a positive pregnancy test.

I remember letting out a little huff, like a humorless laugh, because not that long ago my younger cousin had revealed the very same news to me and in that moment it seemed that everyone I knew was freaking having kids. And I can’t even begin to tell you how pissy that makes me. It’s not really a rational thought to have, but seriously there should be some kind of permit that has to be filed that allows people to procreate. Like, if I want to buy a damn gun I have to fill out paperwork and get a permit and have a background check, but if I want to bring a new being into this world all I have to do is open my damn legs. How fucked up is that? Honestly it’s always been something that baffles me and I know that everyone should be given the choice to do what they want with their own bodies, but freaking hell sometimes I wish we lived in the kind of society/universe where we had to ask permission to procreate. That may sound crazy…okay it does sound crazy because if there were some kind of sanctions on our ability to reproduce there would probably be tons of other crazy laws…

It really does just chafe me that irresponsible people are allowed to fuck up so majorly. Because at the end of the day having unprotected sex is just irresponsible not to mention dangerous. You may as well just play Russian Roulette, that way at least you’re only fucking up your life.

I’m the product of an unwed mother (how weird does that sound) and she and I had this whole conversation this past weekend about my best friend’s situation. If it was me, if I found out I was pregnant by my dead beat ex-boyfriend who already had 3 other children by 3 different women I would high tail it to the nearest clinic and get myself taken care of. That may offend you pro-lifers out there, but I’m sorry, I’m not sorry. I get that your argument is the unborn shouldn’t have to pay for the bad decisions or their parent’s, but how is it any better to subject that life form to a life of hardship. This girl lives at home with her parents still, the fetus’ father is not going to be in the picture, she makes less than $400 a week at her job, and she doesn’t pay bills on her own. She literally does not take care of herself, how is she going to take care of a baby?

I don’t understand it. How can one person be so selfish? Because that’s what it sounds like to me, pure selfishness. You’re putting your beliefs in this fetus above the well being of that future child. I just don’t understand any of it. I guess I can’t see into the minds or hearts of others, all I can know is my own mind and my mind would be telling me to run as fast and as far as I could to make sure that I didn’t damage another living beings life or my own.

I say I’m pro-choice, but sometimes I wish there wasn’t a choice. I wish there was some kind of competency test that you had to take in order to be allowed to rear a child. It’s a gift to bring human life into this world and I honestly wish it was a gift that wasn’t so freely taken advantage of.

This post may very well end up getting brought up again. I’ve got about 7 more months of dealing with the emotions of a pregnant girl who I’d love nothing more to shake until her teeth rattle in her damn head, but I don’t think I’m allowed to do that. So, if I can manage somehow not to throw my 7 year friendship away by telling my best friend that I think she’s a selfish, irresponsible idiot for keeping this baby I’ll end up venting here more often that not. Sorry.

Night!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels

Day 329: Drama on the Horizon

Hello wild ones! How’s life kids? I hope everything is just peachy, it is for me…well mostly anyway.

I only have a week left before I’ll be flying out to Vegas! Whoop! I still have a few things I have to try and buy before them, namely shoes…the one thing I hate shopping for more than anything. I have large feet and an affinity for comfort and a poorly hidden desire to wear cute shoes. It’s not a good combination. So tonight I’m puttering around on a few websites trying to find something suitable for my time in the Sin City next weekend.

Tomorrow’s post may be a bit challenging for me as well as you. I’ve been contemplating my feelings on a sore subject for a week or so now and despite the fact that my opinion may make me a bit unpopular I’m tired of keeping it to myself…well okay I’ve bitched to M about it a ton and I’m sure my family is tired of hearing about it, but honestly sometimes I feel like I’m not dealing with my emotions or situations in my life unless I clue you guys in.

So prepare yourselves. Ha, I’ve made it seems so ominous that I know tomorrow after you’ve read what I’ve got to say you’re going to think, “Jeeze this dramatic bitch did it again. Reeling me in with all these promises of intrigue and then letting me wriggle from the hook over something so stupid.” At least I don’t disappoint in that fashion.

Alright kids, I’m gonna go shoe shop online and drool over the shoes I want and then settle for the ones I can have. Night!

Until tomorrow, stay wonderfully wild!

Chels